Obsidian Sync 2024-11-20 16:12:01

content/daily-notes/2024-11-20.md

@@ -5,7 +5,7 @@ Latest  NYT Amplifier playlist just dropped: [The Amplifier: A Bizarre Love Tria
 _Jolene_ from Beyonce is one of my all-time fav, and I had already heard the song before. Apart from that my fav on that list was _Taste_ by Sabrina Carpenter, followed by _Wildflower_ by Billie Eilish.
 
 #### Frames
-[frames - by Ava - bookbear express](https://www.avabear.xyz/p/frames) 
+[frames - by Ava - bookbear express](https://www.avabear.xyz/p/frames)
 
 > The “frame” of particular friendship might be something like: we text each other fairly regularly, we get dinner at restaurants or we go on walks, we split the bill, we talk about feelings, we do not have physical contact with each outside of hugs. And obviously with a category as ill-defined as friendship frames can vary hugely between people, but I think that’s a pretty standard one that holds true for a lot of male-female friendships. Basically, we have a contract for how we behave with each other, and we both honor it unless/until it needs to be renegotiated. The failure case, of course, is that you simply can’t be friends with someone who isn’t interested in maintaining the frame. One particular behavior that really annoys me (a “red flag,” as they call it) is when someone _verbally_ says one thing and then acts in a very different way. Like, they say, _Let’s be friends, I understand you’re not looking to date anyone_, and then they take you to a very romantic restaurant and pay for dinner. And then suggest sitting on a park bench and try to place a hand on your thigh. It’s like—_hey, I can’t maintain this frame all by myself_.
 >